Morning text from dad

Dad: This morning in the wet grass in back yard I saw a frog with open - toad shoes. My reply: Are you sure it wasn't a croc? 🐊

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Recommend Jokes

Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

1. My wife says she’s sick of me pretending to be a detective. She thinks we should split up.

I said “great idea! We’ll cover more ground that way.”

2. Superman was at the bar drowning his sorrows...

The bartender asked why he was so glum. He told him "I got caught cheating on Lois by sleeping with her sister Lucy." The bartender responded with "Dude, you need to stay in your own Lane."

3. Did you hear about the population of Ireland?

It's Dublin.

4. Earlier today, I swallowed a bottle of Loperamide

I ain't takin' no shit!

5. Why did the coffee file a police report?

Because it got mugged

6. Did you hear about the super-cute puppy that died mysteriously?

They’re performing an Awwwww-topsy.

7. Stephen King has a son named Joe.

I’m not joking…but he is.

8. Women always called me ugly until they learned how much money I have.

After that, they called me ugly and poor.

9. I saw a sign for a yard sale the other day

I thought about checking it out but I already have a yard.

10. I'm the one who tried to sell PacMan to a developer.

They ghosted me.

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Morning text from dad

dadjoke

funny dad jokes